Journalist, Marin Independent Journal
Vicki Larson is an award-winning journalist and co-author of The New I Do: Reshaping Marriage for Skeptics, Realists and Rebels (2014). She lives in the San Francisco Bay Area.
There is a better way to parent than the nuclear family
Love and friendship
A temporary marriage makes more sense than marriage for life
Fairness and equality
Marriage should not come with any social benefits or privileges
I’m not sure it’s manliness that we’re talking about, but for a long time being the breadwinner and the ability to care for his family (financially) was important to men’s identity. And based on a poll and conversations on my blog, un- or underemployed men are not dateable, which has made a lot of women and men unhappy. I would hope that the conversation switches to things other than traditional gendered manliness and femininity, but to recognize, support and nurture caregiving, which is essential to society, in addition to meaningful work. ...
They haven’t; we are no more made for monogamy than men are, and long-term monogamy is hard. Women who divorce and have new lovers very quickly find their libidos kick-started. What does that say?
I have written extensively about parenting marriages and parenting prenups, including a chapter in the book I co-wrote, “The New I Do: Reshaping Marriage for Skeptics, Realists and Rebels.” Love-based marriage is not necessarily the best model in which to raise children; love often leads to conflict, and we know from numerous studies that conflict is ...
Because it’s been seen as women’s work, and as Moira Weigel writes in her book “Labor of Love.” much of what women traditionally have done – cooking, cleaning, caring for the kids, etc. – falls under what we call “love,” and that makes emotional work invisible.